I attended a workshop last week from SpeakOUT, the nation’s oldest LGBTQ+ speakers bureau. I was reflecting with a friend how my story I learned to tell with this organization felt outdated.
We like good stories with happy endings. My story that I practiced telling last year ends with a moment of acceptance, joy, and comfort in my trans identity.
Rey Katz
But right now in the US, I feel like we're in the middle of the story, not the end.
We are actively fighting the legal battles to exist in our paperwork and have access to necessary medical care.
And it's scary. Even me, in my supportive family and stable place to live and running my own business, I feel scared. A lot of people feel scared right now.
And that's okay. Being scared is a really typical and healthy reaction to a threat to one's health and safety. It makes sense.
A lot of us are also angry at our government’s betrayal of us, attempting to erase our rights and our personhood.
I’m frustrated at the logistics of it all. Being trans right now and figuring out any kind of paperwork is like doing your own taxes, on paper, except that someone fed the instructions into a shredder, wrapped some tape around the bundle, dumped a cup of coffee on it, and handed it to you. Is it better to have an F or M gender marker or worse to have a(nother) gender marker change on record? Impossible to know.
This affects anyone who’s ever had a gender marker changed on any of their various identity documents (whether through a mistake or not). A lot of people have mismatched gender markers on their documentation, because it’s always been a lot of bureaucracy and cost to change everything at once.
Some folks who have not had to deal with this bureaucracy think the gender marker thing is bullshit, or a hillarious distraction from the real issues. The problem is, these bullshit, unspecified gender marker rules can have very real consequences like not being able to get a passport, or a visa, or health care. Even if any given person doesn’t experience bad consequences from their documentation, it’s still SO much stress trying to figure out what the “right” thing to do is.
I find myself going down rabbit holes trying to figure out what might happen with my identification documents, and some of it is real and some of it is just fearmongering.
If you go to the DMV and request a change back from ‘X’ to ‘F’ on a drivers license, will they process that or will they take your ID, punch a hole in it, and refuse to issue you a new one because you’re clearly trans? A Real ID drivers license is a federal ID technically falling under federal, not state, regulations.
How would you drive your car back home from the DMV appointment? Your ID would be sitting in the pile of deactivated IDs. Your car insurance would no longer be valid. Your car registration would no longer be valid. What a nightmare.
